I wear running shoes with my dresses. My family makes fun of me but I don’t care. For the past ten years I have suffered many times from stress fractures in one foot or the other. It is no fun! Every time I go to the podiatrist, he tells me to wear better shoes. I buy shoes I feel are better but eventually I find myself with another stress factor. I decided I need to wear them more often. Dress shoes offer little support and my favorites (flip flops) offer me none. So, I’m wearing my supportive tennis shoes (and they better help cause man are they costly) 99% of the time.
I’m sure others wonder why I have on my athletic shoes with a cute dress but I’ve made the decision to not care. Many social norms (such as having on clean clothes, brushing one’s hair, etc.) we should try to follow, but this is not one of them. I’m hoping I’ve had my last stress fracture!
No television, no electronics, no fun.
When a child misbehaves, sometimes the consequences are loss of privileges and grounding. This stinks all around. Of course, it stinks for the child as it is supposed to be teaching them a lesson. It also stinks for the parents who have to enforce it.
I think it is funny how often my kids tell me I’m mean when I have to enforce a consequence because they have no idea how much easier it would be if I just let things go.
Recently, I was told about three siblings who had stolen from a neighbor. They had snuck into a friend’s home and taken some granola bars. Not high criminal activity but enough to warrant some consequences. The parents had the children apologize and then they were all grounded for a week. Grounded from all electronics, grounded from playing outside, and grounded from friends.
My friend and I were discussing how hard that must have been for the mom (as she was home with the kids during the consequences) to stick it out. I imagine the children bickered and argued with her and each other which caused frustration. I’m guessing that staying aware of what the three kids were doing in order to make sure they were not sneaking any electronics was a challenge. I’m also betting she wished the consequence was over almost as much as the kids. I applaud her for sticking it out! I hope the kids learned from their actions and that the consequences made a difference.
I’ll remind myself of this mom next time I want to give into a consequence and tell myself that it will be worth it to stick it out.
JENNIFER EULBERG, MA, LPC
Welcome Jennifer, our new blogger!
Jennifer is a counselor at Sandhill who specializes in depression, self-esteem, and grief & loss. Get to know Jennifer as she shares her perspectives on life, contemplates value themes, and offers gentle encouragement.
THANK YOU to Stefanie Pisarkiewicz, LPC for her blog contributions from November 2014 - February 2019!